Tuesday, June 23, 2015

New Charedi science & history curriculum

Yeshivas Torah Bli Derech Eretz is a Charedi school in Israel that has decided to start teaching science & history to their students!

Of course, it wouldn't do to teach the shmutz that goyim consider to be science and history. Only Torah True science and history will be taught.

Here are some of the courses being developed for the curriculum:

  • Entomology 101: In introductory look at the mechanism of spontaneous generation
  • Advanced Surgical Techniques: An in depth study of the drawings of the Chazon Ish
  • Ancient Babylonian History: How all the Jewish men in Bavel sat in Yeshiva and learned all day
  • Medieval European History: How all the Jewish men in Europe sat in Yeshiva and learned all day
  • Recent European History: How all the Jewish men in Europe sat in Yeshiva and learned all day while wearing black hats
  • Gender Psychology 103: An in depth study of the ways that the female brain is built for nurturing and not for advanced study of texts.

If anyone would like to contribute suggestions for the curriculum, please do so below.

1 comment:

  1. The Origins of Chassidism: How the chassidim and misnagdim were really great friends and all those bans and denunciations were just for lulz.

    Maimonidean Mysticism: Close reading of the Rambam's works to discover where he alluded to concepts of Kabbalah (ein tzorech lomar, and agreed with them all) but disguised them because he knew that it was not time to publish them.

    Gilgul Neshomos 101: Students will write past-life biographies.

    Sexology 501: A graduate-level course, only open to students who have been married for at least seven years and have at least that many children. The Gemara's advice on how to satisfy your wife with the use of pearls and clods of dirt.

    Nutrition 203: Contradictory nutritional advice from Talmud and Rambam's medical texts. Chulent and kugel will be served.

    Immunology 0: A survey of the medical literature warning against the dangers of vaccination.

    Digital Communications 204: Bypassing internet filters, restoring disabled features of kosher phones, how to get invited to join all the cool WhatsApp groups.