Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Egla Arufa and some drunk rabbis

This week's parsha (Shoftim) ends with the halachot of Egla Arufa, which also make an appearance in Bereshit Rabba 94:3


Scene: Roughly 2 millenia ago, a group of rabbis are sitting around somewhere in the ancient near east, getting drunk on some good wine

R. Yankel: Dude, this is good (hic!) stuff! 45 BCE! A good year.

R. Chazkel: Gimme some

R. Yankel: Hey, have you ever noticed that Rav Mendel is cross eyed? That's why his class is so noisy. He can't control his pupils!

R. Chazkel and R. Dovid: Groan! That's terrible!

R. Zevulun: Hey, when Hashem wanted to have a flood but save 2 of every animal, he didn't know who to ask. Then his buddy said, "I Noah guy"!

(R. Dovid looks daggers at R. Zevulun)

R. Levi: Hey, I once heard a good one from Rav Yochanan bar Shaul...

R. Chazkel: (interrupting) No, don't say it. His are the worst!

R. Levi: Hold on, this one is good! You know how Yaakov knew that Yosef was alive only when he saw the wagons Yosef sent? Because they'd been studying the halachos of Egla Arufa before Yosef left, and the wagons were a sign!

(stunned silence)

R. Levi: Don't you get it? Agala, Egla?

(others shake their heads with exasperation)

R. Levi: Screw you guys, it's funny!

(Unnoticed in the corner, a naive and innocent student is feverishly taking notes.)

A century or so later, the Amora Hoshaya is putting together Bereshit Rabba, and needs some more material...

1 comment:

  1. i think u poste this on dovbear and it was taken down there was also a follow up can you post it here?